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Selasa, 30 Agustus 2011
Atelophobia
I guess everyone in this world, even though just a little bit, feels the same way. No one's perfect.
Last night I had a little chat with my best friend about this; about how I sometimes feel that every one around me is moving forward in a really fast pace. Whereas I, just stay in one place. It makes me sad and afraid to look around me. Though that's what my friend told me to do. Why don't you stop for a while and take a look? You'll feel surprised what your presence brings to us, he said. To this I just wanna say I don't know. I don't know how people feel when I'm around, and sometimes that makes me scared. And all the 'what if's came into my mind. I know it's holding me back and it's making me feel like I'm never enough towards someone. I know that this is an illness that is quite hard to find a cure for. But a friend told me that all you need to do is accept yourself. Acceptance is the key.
I'm grateful for that conversation last night. I'm trying so hard to accept myself; accept the slow pace that I'm going with just to enjoy everything that I hold near and dear first, even though that it's not as interesting as people judge me to be; acceptance of being left behind by the people you see around you; accept the situation I'm currently in, the ups and downs; and of course, accepting you the way you are.
I'm slowly, and hopefully surely, learning to accept all of the things that I encounter.
Acceptance. As you leave me behind, just remember that I'm always here smiling at you when you look back.
Last night I had a little chat with my best friend about this; about how I sometimes feel that every one around me is moving forward in a really fast pace. Whereas I, just stay in one place. It makes me sad and afraid to look around me. Though that's what my friend told me to do. Why don't you stop for a while and take a look? You'll feel surprised what your presence brings to us, he said. To this I just wanna say I don't know. I don't know how people feel when I'm around, and sometimes that makes me scared. And all the 'what if's came into my mind. I know it's holding me back and it's making me feel like I'm never enough towards someone. I know that this is an illness that is quite hard to find a cure for. But a friend told me that all you need to do is accept yourself. Acceptance is the key.
I'm grateful for that conversation last night. I'm trying so hard to accept myself; accept the slow pace that I'm going with just to enjoy everything that I hold near and dear first, even though that it's not as interesting as people judge me to be; acceptance of being left behind by the people you see around you; accept the situation I'm currently in, the ups and downs; and of course, accepting you the way you are.
I'm slowly, and hopefully surely, learning to accept all of the things that I encounter.
Acceptance. As you leave me behind, just remember that I'm always here smiling at you when you look back.
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